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6/3/2013- Getting...No, Staying Motivated!

“What God intended for you goes far beyond anything you can imagine.”  Oprah Winfrey

I’ve been hearing a lot of people lately complaining about being motivated, myself for one! Everyone has their days, but whether you are striving to become motivated with- fitness, work/school, personal life, or your spiritual life, I believe these few tips to live by will help you get on the right track!

Get organized- Organizing your tasks and goals helps you put your ideas on paper and this makes it easier to know where you are and where you would like to be. Make a list for each area in your life that is important to you that you are finding hard to stay motivated in. For example: I make 2 lists every night before I go to bed. One for my personal life and one for my professional life. If I didn’t finish the things I had planned on that day I just add on and remove the things I accomplished. This helps me manage my time more efficiently and I see how much I have accomplished at the end of the day. It is a good feeling.

Limit your late nights- Drinking and partying are the easiest ways to lose your motivation for the next day. Limit your late nights to only weekends or only 2 nights a week. On your hangover days make it light- stretching, brain storming, reading. All of these you can do laying down. Don’t forget to drink lots of water (and a shot of pickle juice…that is my hangover secret. Haha)

Give up the excuses- I hate this saying, but hey- “excuses are like assholes, everyone has one”. It’s true… excuses are the devil! If you let them in your head once it will be easier to let them take over your life. Don’t let them pimp you! “It’s too hot outside to go for a jog”- get your butt in the gym! “I’m too tired to study/work/clean house” – work for an hour or 2 and take a break then work for another couple of hours.

Make plans with someone- Treat your tasks like a dinner reservation or doctor’s appointment. If you make it important enough you will less likely back out. Making plans with someone else or telling someone you are going to do something immediately makes you feel that you are accountable for your actions. Get a work out buddy, pray with a friend, or find someone to partner up with at work. Statistics show that if you work with some else in sales you are going to sell 50% more, this is the same in all other areas too.

Make it fun- I live by- “If you enjoy your job it doesn’t feel like you are working”. This again is the same in other areas. If you make your task fun you will look forward to it. Start a weight loss contest with friends, change your work scenery and connect from a café, schedule a bike tour, join a prayer group.

 

Please share with me your motivation hold ups or tips so we can find ways to overcome them together!

 

5/29/2013- Halfway There!!!

I hope everyone had a great Memorial Day Weekend! We spent ours with family, swimming, eating, and drinking (water for me…oh how I miss my wine!!!).

My niece, Ella, and I on Memorial Day

Well we are halfway into our pregnancy! I am 5 months today but am still not really showing…Last night I felt him moving around and looked down and my belly was moving as he kicked. I missed this feeling so much! No one will ever understand the emotions (joy, fear, excitement, curiosity) unless you have experienced a life growing inside of you.
I have been talking to Grayson about being a big brother and his responsibilities. I realize he is only 3 but he is so smart and I think he understands to an extent. At some point you have to start talking to and treating kids as adults to help them transition into growing up and making good decisions on their own. I think this is a good time to start with him. I don’t mean having serious conversations and expecting him to do chores or anything like that. What I mean is talking to him about sleeping in his big boy bed, sharing, going potty by himself, teaching him to brush his teeth, washing his body; those kind of things. He loves doing tasks on his own and he loooooves getting the prizes when he does a good job. I am determined to have this boy potty trained before Jeff gets back in a month.
So far, in the few weeks, he has only had a couple of accidents. Some things that have helped me:
-I started writing down the times he goes and noticed it was around the same time every day. So at those times I either keep asking him if he needs to go, or I will take his pull-up off and put the toddler potty in the living room (this works because we have wood floors), or I will put him on the potty myself around that time every 15min until he goes.
-Once he goes I make a big deal out of it! Give him his favorite snack, candy, sticker, tattoo, have him call someone to tell them, give him a hug and kiss and tell him how proud I am of him. He then is proud of himself.
-If your child is in daycare ask the teacher to write down what time they use the bathroom everyday so you can follow the schedule. At Grayson’s school they put him on the potty and at least try every 2 hours.

Jeff left for off shore about a week ago so Grayson and I are able to get back into our routine. When Jeff is in town it is harder to make him go to bed at a certain hour and eat dinner at the same time every night because our schedules are so hectic and we want to spend as much time together as possible at night. When Jeff left he told Grayson to take care of mommy while he was gone. The other day he was playing with a toy and it accidently hit my foot. He said “I kiss it mommy” I quickly replied “no buddy, you don’t need to kiss my foot” he said, in the sweetest little voice “Yeah, I take care of you momma”. Talk about bringing tears to a prego's eyes! I honestly believe he sees his daddy being sweet to me and he is learning to act the same way. I know there is no man out there that is sweet 100% of the time but we need to be sure to remind our significant others that they are their heroes, and no matter how young, boys are watching and will mimic the things they do and say. I am sure it is the same way with girls. They see their mommies acting like ladies and they will mimic crossing their legs, saying please, and thank you, etc. Let me know what you think and follow my blog, I have some exciting stuff coming up!

My sweet boy!

 

5/22/2013- Why Do Couples Fight Over Money?

The number one reason why couples break up is over money.
The median age for first time marriages in around 30. At this time it is normal to combine finances but it is not as simple as our parents/grandparents have us believe. Times have changed and more people are independent and have already developed their way of managing their finances on their own and are used to spending their money on the things that make them happy. So couples are bringing financial baggage into the relationship. Most people at this age already have invested in their 401k, have student loan debt, maybe even investments or mortgages. Because of this it is important for couples to talk about their separate finances and develop a plan together.

Did you know:
40% of people say they do not completely trust their partners to manage their combined finances
Only 38% said they were only somewhat aware of their significant other’s debts
21% said they sometimes hide their spending from their significant other

So how do we learn to agree on our household finances with our significant other?

 

First thing is first- find out the reason why you fight.

Reason #1: One person is the spender and the other is the saver.
You have very different ideas and values when it comes to money. The spender feels constrained and the saver feels insecure. Learn to find your partners financial strengths. For instance- My husband and I are in the process of buying a new family car. He is the spender and is wanting something brand new and fancy. Me on the other hand, the saver, would be happy with an inexpensive used car. So to compromise we test drove a few brand new SUVs to decide which make and model we liked the best and my husband has allowed me to search and find the best deal. The point is to aim to make a better decision as a couple than you would as individuals. Before you make a decision make sure you communicate you needs and expectations and that you set a limit of how much you are both wanting to spend.

Reason #2: Having a single-income household.
The person bringing home the bacon expects to be in control of the spending, while the non-earning partner usually believes the decisions should be made jointly. This creates stress, conflict, and imbalance of power. What this boils down to is control and a marriage is a partnership: using money to control your spouse can seriously damage a relationship. Start by talking about the subject at a calm time, not when you are in an argument about money. A good way to establish balance is by setting a specific dollar amount for each partner’s spending and by agreeing to discuss any purchase over a certain limit before buying it. Finding balance on this issue will not happen over night. So if one of you breaks the new rule, talk about why and make necessary adjustments. If you still find yourself arguing over the same situation consider speaking with a marriage counselor to get a third party’s point of view.

Reason #3: Disagreeing on spending priorities for the kids.
Are you really arguing over private school versus public school, no you are arguing over values. You need to talk about the real issue or you will keep having the same fight over and over again. These conflicts arise from the way the spouse was raised. For example, my husband was raised in the suburbs getting brand new name brand clothes while I was raised on a farm with 2 older sisters getting hand me downs. Either way, just explaining the emotions behind each of your beliefs will help you find common ground.
Try to reach a compromise. Always ask “will we need to sacrifice anything to spend the extra money?” Maybe the common ground is sending your kids to private school but have them buy their own clothing with allowance money, or send then to public school but pay for extracurricular activities to provide the extra enrichment.

Reason #4: One of you have debt.
Dragging around the extra baggage of debt will always cause stress. Especially if you disagree with your partner about saving for a rainy day or paying off your balances. The easiest way to fix the situation is buy tackling the debt head on. You can possibly do this on your own or you can talk to a financial advisor to help you crunch the numbers and decide what is a realistic way to take care of it. Be sure to talk about your priorities and goals. One of you might find security as being debt-free while the other feels safer having a large savings account. Once you find out where each other is coming from it will be easier to find balance.

Reason #5: A lot of people think that keeping your bank accounts separate reduces the risk of fighting over money.

This isn’t always true. Maybe one person takes on more of the fixed expenses, mortgage, car payments, insurance, while the other handles variable expenses such as, clothing, food, household items. These variable expenses can’t be predicted, so one partner can often wind up “in the hole”.

A good way to fix this problem is to divvy up the monthly expenses based on the percentage of income each person contributes to the household. For example, if you make $25,000 and your partner makes $50,000 he/she should be able to contribute twice as much. Be sure to sit down together at least once a month and go over what is being spent on what so each person is aware of the entire financial picture.

Reason #6: One of you is a Secret Spender.

It may be that one of you isn’t used to being accountable for your spending habits or that you fear the reaction of your partner. But when your sprees or debt are discovered your partner will feel betrayed, and you will be in the hot seat. You are more than likely already deep in the relationship when this secret is revealed. If that is the case, get a separate bank account for the spender and give him/her a fixed amount each month to spend. If the situation is far worse than this then find a counselor to help find out why the spender needs to keep secrets. The best way to avoid this fight is to discuss spending habits before you merge your finances. Also be sure to focus your conversation on the importance of trust.

 

Reason #7: Someone isn’t paying the bills on time.

The cause of this fight is because the person who was designated the “money manager” is failing to meet the financial obligations and putting the family in financial danger. Not paying the bills on time causes bad credit ratings, late pay fees, even foreclosure or eviction. The person may be feeling overwhelmed and might not want this responsibility. If that is the case discuss splitting up the responsibility of paying the bills. Set a date each month to discuss your state, goals, and any issues that come up. That way one person won’t feel like he/she isn’t holding all the burden. Sometimes signing up for automatic bill payments is the best solution to this problem.  Just don’t place blame, try to find a solution together.

Reason #8: One of you borrows money from family-without the other knowing.

Borrowing money from family is like working with family. It is not always the best idea, especially if you are keeping it from your partner. Sooner or later they are going to notice you’re making a monthly payment to daddy. This also includes loaning money to a family member without discussing it with your partner first. This fight comes down to trust. Discuss why this decision was made alone. Your partner should always be your first stop when it comes to solving financial problems. The first step is to check with your partner, if he/she disagrees with borrowing or lending, talk about alternative options.

The best way to get financially organized and to view your entire financial portfolio all on one page is by creating your own LBS site. We use the very best security technology so your data will always be safe!

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Please feel free to ask me any questions, leave comments, or let me know what your specific issues are so I can help!

 

 

5/16/2013- I'm Baaaaaccckkk!

These past few weeks have just been non-stop! From my personal to professional schedule there hasn’t been a calm in my storm… I can’t help but feel nothing more than blessed for this, though.
It just hit me today that our newest addition will be here in 4 months! We were so excited to find out last week that we will be blessed with another boy! I feel so relieved, knowing what to expect and that I have an abundance of clothes, shoes, bibs, toys, etc. ready for our little prince. Grayson is so happy he is getting a little brother. We talk about him and to him every day. I feel him moving around in there, and am so nervous we will be having a 12 pounder. Jeff was almost 12lbs and I was about 10lbs. eeeek! Grayson was 3 weeks early so he was a little 7lb bundle. Keep me in your prayers! J

I am so happy that I have found a Marketing Assistant that I believe will be able to help me grow and reach the next level in my business. I have so many ideas and cannot wait to get everything in full swing! We will be starting our Women, Wealth, and Wine Seminar Series in July, I will start guest speaking on a talk radio show in a couple of weeks, I have joined some awesome networking groups, and I plan on bringing so much more to this blog for my Professional Women and Mommies out there! Stay tuned!

4/11/2013- Becoming a "Rich Chick"

I just started reading this book that was written by Michelle Maston with Wealth Design Group LLC called "Rich Chick". I really don't read much unless it is research or something that is going to better me intellectually, emotionally, or spiritually. I believe this book will not only be intellectually inspiring but also financially! As I read I will share the points I find significant throughout different posts on my blog.
Today I want to share
"The Nine Rich Chick Must-Have Accessories"

* Inquisitiveness- Your beliefs and values are at the core of who you are, and many of those beliefs and values you learned as a child. As adults, we incorporate our beliefs and values into ideas that yield either positive or negative results. Being inquisitive means you can have total control over your money decisions. You can choose how to deal with the money demons that haunt you, and evolve into a healthy lifestyle that will allow you to create fun and powerful ways to handle your money. Ultimately, the wise decisions you make will positively impact your future.

* Purpose- Your True Purpose for Money is bigger than money itself- it's your true purpose for everything that motivates you in life. Use your True Purpose to motivate your best money decisions.

* Future-Focused- Wandering aimlessly through life will only get you so far. If you have big dreams, it is critical to be specific about when, where and how you are going to accomplish them. Create a "Future You" map that will give you focus and direction for achieving your goals.

* Determination- Determination is the one accessory that will single-handedly take us farther than any other Rich Chick Must-Have Accessory. No matter what kind of Rich Chick you are, determination will provide the kind of stamina that will drive you throughout your Rich Chick journey. Life is full of twists and turns; that's why we need to be determined beyond the day-to-day and learn to look at how our choices will impact the bigger picture down the road.

* Discipline- If it were easy everyone would be rich. It takes a little self-control and discipline to do what needs to be done. You have to pay yourself first and protect your future like a ferocious mama bear.

* Savvy- A Rich Chick is Savvy about her investment choices. She is well-informed and perceptive when it comes to her financial future. She makes financial decisions based on solid information that will last long-term.

* Intelligence- Use the intelligence of the true experts of economics and investing when it comes to your financial future; don't rely on predictions or fortune-tellers.

* Commitment- Sticking to the rules isn't always easy, but a Rich Chick sees the bigger picture and has the will to stick with the program.

* Coachability- It's easier to be accountable to someone beyond yourself. A good investor coach will help keep you on the right track even when the going gets rough.

Just like putting together the perfect outfit, figuring out the perfect portfolio and investment plan for your begins with the Nine Rich Chick Must-Have Accessories.

Please feel free to comment below or add on.

 

4/9/2013- Oops We Did It Again!

It has been a hectic week to say the least! My brain has been everywhere but in my head the past several days. I’m talking ADDx10!! I sometimes wish I was given the super power of OCD rather than the ADD and Dyslexia. You gotta work with what God gave you and make the best out of it, though. I definitely keep myself busy with work and also at home, but my husband gets a little frustrated because of all the different projects that are taking over our house. The New Year’s Resolution I made this year was to complete one project before I start another…I haven’t started nor finished a project yet. Lol! We got married in October 2012 and I am still working on our shadow box, photo album, and thinking of a way to reuse my gorgeous dress (let me know if you have any suggestions!).
I mentioned in the beginning of my blog that I had a huge secret that I was keeping. Well, it is now out in the open and I can shout it from the roof tops- we are expecting our second baby!!!! I will be 13 weeks tomorrow but still not really showing. I am just getting over the nausea and fatigue but, like I said, my brain is still in a different dimension. Jeff and Grayson are both super excited and are counting down the days until our new addition arrives.



4/2/2013- Are You Making The Right Financial Decisions?

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The Live Balance Sheet

4/1/2013- I Hate April 1st!

Sorry I wasn’t able to post any recipes over the weekend. Like I say, everything happens for a reason and I was unable to get an internet connection from the condo. This allowed us to spend some quality time together bonding, walking the beach and seawall, eating out and just relaxing! It was great! But after 2 days of “not being a mom” I was over it and ready to get home to my baby! Lol. I doubt Grayson thought once about me though; he was having a blast at Tita’s Ranch with my family. He loves it out there because he is able to be with his animals, run freely, and eat and drink whatever he wants! Hopefully I will get some time to cook this week and will share recipes and pictures.

Well today is April Fool’s Day. I am so gullible so I do everything I can to avoid today! I literally stay at home. I can’t recall when this hatred started, but as much as I prepare myself for today I don’t understand how I always get fooled. It happened again today… Jeff got me with the good ole' "I got pulled over and the cops are taking me in for a suspended license." joke. It took me about 10 minutes to realize he was lying. I was pissed and he thought it was the funniest thing ever. Booo to today!

Our view this past weekend. Gorgeous!

3/28/2013- JonAnn

I.can’t.stop.eating! All I’ve wanted to do lately is eat and sleep- my two favorite past times. So I am definitely looking forward to today! I am out this “b” come 2:00 to start my Easter weekend. My son’s Easter party is today and I always volunteer to help with these parties, not only because I love watching the kids but because of the array of treats the parents bring! Lol. He went to school with his button up and Spiderman basket in hand ready to notify the Easter Bunny what he needs. He said he is going to tell him he needs “candy, quarters, tattoos, and puzzles”. Hah! JonAnn is going to come surprise him at school too. If you don’t know JonAnn, well she… is my mother. Some of these 3 year olds are almost her size. We think she might hit a growth spurt soon. My mom is the typical blonde, but it’s not natural. Once she left the TV on for a whole week because she thought it was broken…not once checking the remote to see if it was the batteries or walking up to the TV to try turning it off by pushing the buttons. Bless her heart. Haha. She is great, though it’s shocking to think that she raised 3 amazing girls, thank goodness for our Tita (dad's mom)!

I will be doing a lot of cooking this weekend, so come visit for some scrumptious recipes and pictures! 

Grayson on Easter 2011